Recently, I had put out a single called; "Alright". Produced by my good friends JL Love and Reverb. We released it on October 22nd, 2010. I had been reluctant to put it out. Guess I was not ready yet to share anything musically. After hearing everyone asking me; "what is taking you so long to come back with another record?" I had no explanation except for one thing... "I'm not ready yet". "I thought to myself and explained to my friends & supporters, that I need to transform myself from the inside out." Sort of like cleaning house.
I found myself getting rid of things that I didn't need, that included people too. I had been through quiet a few crazy years, some of which had honestly broke me down and built me right back up. Now that I think of it I could never understand the saying; "pain makes great art"...? I always thought "pain is what kept you down". Then again this is where I was a few years ago, feeling really unmotivated and thought I just should turn in the towel. I was in a personal space that felt really boxed in and almost claustrophobic. I can thank God even more now that he rescued me from this sadness and gave me the graces of what I call; "The Readiness".
So on December 22nd, 2010 I had weight loss surgery. I had to become very brave to let go of certain things and certain people. I had to make changes that would last me for the rest of my life. But, when you think about it... we've all been in that crazy place once or twice before. Then we ask ourselves; "why don't I just climb out of this pit? What am I doing here? Why is it so hard to change? How do I begin?"
Sometimes, we find excuses to stay in those bad situations; may they be sad or hurtful relationships or a loss of confidence in yourself and maybe others around you. You eventually know you got to move on and forget the disappointment of the past. Just keep on plugging away at what you want as you build on your dreams to come true. You know that you have to close that book on the past and start a new one for the new beginning we sometimes embark on a few times in our life.
I believe that allowing stressful and polluted relationships into your life, can do a great deal of damage to ones health and well being. My decision was to remain strong and take back what is rightfully mine. I would also be taking back me and loving myself in a different way that God would find pleasing. I'm fortunate to have been and still am surrounded by wonderful family, friends and supporters of my music and the journey that I'm on. I thank you all that you have stood by my side through the years. I appreciate your confidence in me. To be continued...
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